I decided to write about my experience having a baby for the first time. My audience is probably adults, primarily women, but anyone who wants to learn about trusting in the Lord. I chose this story because it is one of the most powerful experiences I have had in learning to rely on the Lord. I want to share it so that others can see the blessings that we receive when we trust in him. My color scheme is going to be light green, gold, and brown.
Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not
By Vanessa Lunt
When my husband and I found out we were going to have a baby, we were thrilled. As far as the ailments of pregnancy, I hadn’t anticipated having a lot of trouble. None of my family members had had any serious conditions and I didn’t recall my mom being extremely sick. Because of this, I thought pregnancy wouldn’t interrupt my life very much. I was going to school full time and working part time. I already had a full load to say the least.
The first few weeks of pregnancy, I felt fine. It was about seven or eight weeks in that I was hit by the biggest shock of my life. One night, I immediately started throwing up. I remembered thinking to myself, “why didn’t anyone tell me how horrible this would be?” I was truly surprised that I had severely underestimated what it meant to have all-day “morning sickness.”
One day, while lying in my bed, I became so overwhelmed by all that I was responsible for. I knew that I was not going to be capable of all that I had taken on. I was afraid that I would have to drop out of school. I was afraid I would have to quit my job. I suddenly felt a sense of regret and doubted our decision to have a baby. Then a scripture came to my mind. D&C 6:36 “Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not.”
I started to rely on the Lord and life became manageable. I wish I could say that my morning sickness went away but it didn’t. It lasted almost my entire pregnancy but I was stronger because I remembered to trust in the Lord.
Two days after my due date, I started having contractions. “This is it!” I thought with excitement. I labored through the night and hoped that I would be far enough along to go into the hospital the next day. Delivery was so close! When I woke up that morning, I was a little alarmed that I didn’t feel the baby moving. I took some quite time alone to feel for her movements but I didn’t feel any. I went for a walk, ate breakfast, and tried to encourage the baby to move. Nothing happened. My heart sank and I was absolutely terrified. Had I been through all of this physical suffering only to lose the reward in the end? Would I have to come home to our cute littler nursery without the baby it was meant for?
In this moment, I remembered the impression I’d had months earlier. “Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not.” It was as if the Lord was saying, “I have carried you this far, did you think I would abandon you at the end?” It was then that I knew everything was going to be OK. I did not know what the outcome would be, I did not receive a special witness saying my baby would be fine, but I felt an undeniable peace. I knew I could trust in the Lord and that he would be with me no matter what happened.
When we arrived at the hospital, we felt the greatest sense of relief when we saw our baby’s heart beat on the monitor. Her heart rate would drop slightly with every contraction and movement was still low so they decided to induce me and speed up the process of getting her hear. The next 24 hours were brutal. Labor was slow, the epidural stopped working, and I was beyond miserable. I was again at a crossroad of my faith. After pushing for three hours, I felt like the suffering was more than I could bear. I had given up. I felt I couldn’t push any longer.
I then remembered how the Lord had carried me to this point. I remembered his words again “Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not.” I couldn’t believe that I’d been going about this again without trusting Him. As soon as I thought of our Savior, I found strength. I no longer doubted that I could keep going. I wasn’t afraid of what was going to happen. I knew the savior was beside me.
I made the choice to move forward and somehow, I was able to push through delivery and meet our sweet little baby. She is a great blessing and a great reminder every day to look to the Lord in every thought. When we do this, our doubts and fears are removed from our view and we can move forward with faith in the Lord.